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When I switched from being a lawyer to being a writer, I had no idea that in order to write for a living in the digital age, one had to develop, more than anything else, a thick skin.

Natural ability, attention to style and willingness to learn seemed much less important traits than the purely strength-based characteristic of being able to handle any negative feedback thrown at me. Scratch that: what I really mean is that people can be really, really terrible to each other in an environment where there is no accountability. Once you’re sitting comfortably in your home or office, behind the glowing screen where no one can see you, it seems people are bolstered into being as vitriolic as possible.

People that choose to comment on most websites are either unendingly flattering or unyieldingly vicious. Can these people really be that mean in “real life”? I highly doubt it. Wouldn’t we encounter these people more frequently in our everyday dealings with the world, from work to the bank to the coffee shop? More probably, these are just people frustrated or otherwise stunted from expressing themselves in their non-online life that feel more secure behind the veil of the internet.

Here’s my question: what’s up with that?

Seriously, what?

That certainly isn’t the most eloquent thought I’ve ever had but it’s from an honest place. I truly, truly don’t get why people feel the need to go online and tear other people down. And, it makes me sad.

It also makes me mad. When someone has gone out of their way to share some thoughts with the world, how insanely mean do you have to be to try as hard as possible to make them feel like crap? Or even if someone comments something FAVORABLE, just because you don’t agree with it, you think that gives you free reign to name-call, curse and just generally be a terrible human being?

It doesn’t.

It makes you a jerk.

Image Source DCoetzee

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I just started a new job at an amazing company – some of you may have heard of it. It’s called The Huffington Post.

Those who know me well know it’s been a dream of mine for a long time to work here and now that I’m here, it’s no less than awesome. In starting here, I had to leave a job that was great experience for me – a lawyer trying to turn into a writer – but wasn’t the most user-friendly place I’ve ever worked. Nor was it a good fit for my personality.

Beginning my new job last week reminded me of a blog post I’ve been meaning to do for awhile now about work, life, the balance, and our crappy culture of ceaseless work in America. Coming from the culture of law firms, overworked/overpaid attorneys, and little to no importance placed on real life in the legal world, I’ve long felt like I want to scream at people to stop making me feel like I’m less noble for wanting to live a real life, with a real work-life balance.

In fact, I think it’s stupid that “work-life balance” is even a thing. How about just life? With the right amount of work mixed in, just like the right amount of happiness.

It seems to me that so many of us have lost sight of what life is supposed to be about: life. Not work. The reality is I’ve talked about this topic before and I’ve always felt very strongly about it: the fact that we work five days out of seven, over 8 hours a day (not including the commute) and take two weeks of vacation out of 52 signals to me that right now, in America, the thing that we value the highest is work. Not family, not love, not travel, not wellness: work work work at any cost.

And it’s bullshit.

When I started my new job, I had no idea that it was going to be such a perfect fit with my personality. And then I realized, I shouldn’t have been surprised. The Huffington Post is a progressive company, a company of the future, a company that understands that a happy, balanced employee is a more productive employee. I mean, come on: GPS for the Soul? That’s a company that knows what it’s doing!

And I could not be happier! :-)

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President Obama's Second Inauguration

President Obama took his official oath of office today in a small, private ceremony at the White House. The constitution mandates that the official swearing-in take place on January 20th, and the president will hold a large, public ceremony tomorrow. The event was open to a limited media presence and the guests were only his immediate family, First Lady Michelle Obama and daughters Malia and Sasha. Chief Justice John Roberts presided.

After reciting the oath, Obama was first congratulated by the Chief Justice. “Congratulations, Mr. President,” he said.

“Thank you, Mr. Chief Justice, thank you so much,” Obama responded.

He then hugged his wife and his kids. Youngest daughter Sasha said succinctly, “Good job, Daddy.”

“I did it,” he told her.

Read the rest at Mediaite

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Benson KuaAs I mentioned in my last post, I’ve always been a pretty big fan of MSNBC. Yes – I realize it’s basically an echo chamber for my own liberal thoughts, but that’s why it’s not my exclusive news source. When I feel like watching people I agree with, I happily flip to MSNBC. When I want to be see what the opposition thinks, I’ll flip elsewhere.

I’m also guilty of being staunchly convinced of my own beliefs at any point in time, but I think without conviction, there’s no point in holding your views in the first place. I’ve recently begun, however, to see the value in bringing both sides of an issue to the table – especially when there’s no solution in sight.

There are a few major exceptions, though, and the one which really makes me lose faith in people is this: civil rights. There is absolutely no need for “both sides” of the “issue” to come to the table when we are debating someone’s civil rights. There is, in fact, no need for us to “debate” civil rights.

It’s absolutely crazy to me that conservative Republicans who would deny a same-sex couple’s right to marry are invited to discuss the issue, push new legislation and influence American thought. Does someone else marrying a person they love – of the same sex or not – impact your life in any meaningful way? No. It unequivocally does not. So you – and others of your discriminatory, homophobic ilk – should not have a seat at the table to discuss the non-existant issue of whether same-sex couples should be allowed to marry.

Is there any reasonable, logical argument that can be made against gay marriage? An argument that isn’t tinged with religious underpinnings that mean nothing in a non-religious government dialogue?

No.

There isn’t.

So don’t just take your homophobic, narrow-minded views off the table – take them out of the room.

And don’t come back.

Image Source Benson Kua

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Liberals, can we please grow a backbone?

Last week, President Barack Obama nominated former Senator Chuck Hagel to be the nation’s next secretary of defense. The choice was wracked with controversy from both sides: although Hagel is a Republican, his break with traditional GOP views on foreign affairs gained him criticism from his peers as well as from Democrats across the aisle.

It’s not just his views on international politics that have hurt his reputation, though: in 1998, Hagel opposed the nomination of James Hormel to be the next ambassador to Luxembourg because he was too “openly, aggressively gay. “Hagel, of course, apologized for those comments. Last month. That’s right, he apologized for homophobic comments he made, 14 years after he made them, after he was already reportedly being considered for secretary of defense.

That doesn’t sound like a shrewd political move at all. It sounds like a totally sincere apology which obviously means he’s had a change of heart and seen the light on his homophobic views.

Hagel stated in his apology that his homophobic comments do not represent the “totality” of his public record, and that’s true, they don’t. Hagel believes that force should be used only after diplomacy and he was brave enough to break with his party on that view. He’s also a decorated war hero who served his country with loyalty.

But why are so many liberals giving him a pass on these discriminatory, disgusting comments?

A panel on MSNBC (which, I will openly admit, is usually one of my favorite TV channels) last month laughed (LAUGHED!) about Hagel’s “openly” homophobic comments. Joy Reid, managing editor of The Grio, said, “His only truly objectionable comment was his comment on the gay community, which he made about one person who has forgiven him.”

Author Catherine Crier and New York Times reporter Nick Confessore agreed, noting that it was “long ago,” “two years after Bill Clinton signed” the Defense of Marriage Act. Apparently, “it was a very different time in gay rights.”

… What? MSNBC, the go-to liberal network, defending the nomination of an “openly” homophobic man because his comments were 14 years ago? And because he apologized… last month?

And MSNBC isn’t alone: Washington Post columnist Jonathan Capehart released an editorial yesterday saying he was “openly” in support of Hagel’s apology. The stated reason? Hagel’s view “wasn’t far from the mainstream” at the time it was made.

Here’s a question: what if the comments were racist, instead? And what if they were made in the 1960′s? Would we be so quick to give Hagel a pass because it was a “very different time” in civil rights? The simple answer is no. We would recognize that even though treating black Americans like second-class citizens was the “mainstream” then, it was still wrong. We would recognize that espousing discriminatory views just because most Americans were also racist didn’t give you a pass: it made you a sheep.

Mediaite editor and my colleague Noah Rothman volunteers this explanation for the strange phenomenon of liberals defending homophobic statements: “But all sins are washed away in the glow of the Obama administration’s approval. Even the bigoted comments of a former Republican office holder.”

I’m not sure if that’s exactly what’s happening, but I am sure that liberal talking heads laughing over homophobic comments is perplexing and disappointing, to say the least.

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The “In” Crowd

January 11, 2013

So, as I’ve recently discovered, it’s impossibly hard to keep up with a blog when you’re working all the time. Well, it is for me. I should mention I know more than a few people who are amazingly efficient at both working hard and blogging hard and I am forever in admiration of that. But [...]

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Is The American Dream A Hoax?

December 13, 2012

My latest column at Mediaite is one of my very favorites, so please check it out! It’s called, “Is The American Dream A Hoax?” Here’s a teaser: We Americans pride ourselves on the idea that in our country, a little hard work, determination and focus can make dreams come true. We compare ourselves with countries [...]

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Americans: We Are Now Overwhelmingly Too Fat To Defend Ourselves

December 11, 2012

Mother Jones published an article this afternoon from which one key line caught my eye: “Obesity is now the leading cause of ineligibility for people who want to join the Army.” Apparently, “under intense pressure to trim ::pun intended?:: its budget, the Army is dismissing a rising number of soldiers who do not meet its fitness [...]

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My New Gig!

December 5, 2012

I know I’ve been absent for a while, but fear not, I’ll be back soon! The reason for my absence is pretty exciting – I just landed a role as an editor for political website, Mediaite! Check out my author page, here: Mediate.com/author/anjali-sareen

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Lawrence O’Donnell Says Ricky Gervais is More Christ-like than Reverend Pat Robertson

November 27, 2012

Tonight, on MSNBC’s “The Last Word,” host Lawrence O’Donnell responded to the first shots fired by Pat Robertson and Fox News in the War on Christmas. Robertson, host of the über religious “The 700 Club“, stated that atheists were “miserable” and wanted to make everyone else miserable, too, and, to boot, were “trying to steal” [...]

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